Wiping The Crazy Off My Face
Looking at my life through OCD colored glasses.
Cause I said so!
Apparently some of you are tired of people like Dear Abby and
Dr. Phil and their common sense approach to problem solving. You prefer instead to have your problems solved and your questions answered by someone with absolutely no qualifications whatsoever.
I like that about you.
And so, rather than send an email reply to everyone that desperately needs my advice, I'll answer them right here whenever I feel like it.
A few things to remember before you email me for advice:
I am not a licensed therapist... although I am an ordained minister through the Universal Life Church. Sure, it took me five minutes or less to become ordained, but does that make me any less a minister? Probably.
I am often very frank in my answers. That means that for about a week in the middle of the month, I might be slightly mean. If you can't handle the heat, step away from the "send" button.
Your true identity will never be revealed. You should know however, that if I am ever captured and threatened with bamboo shoots under my nails, I will sing like a canary. Truthfully, I am likely to sell you out for gum. (I like gum.) If you are worried I might get all hopped up on Wrigley's Spearmint and tell the world your name, address and phone number, don't give it to me.
Please type, "Cause I Said So" in the subject line of your email so that I will know you are not trying to sell me something to increase the size of my little man or hook me up with attractive singles in my area.
